Real Men Watch the Bachelor

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Regardless of the fact that this is a show that admittedly I began watching because  of my wife, I feel the Bachelor (and to a lesser extent the Bachelorette) gets a bad rap for being a show that other guys think only women can enjoy.  This, my friends, is not the case, and I will explain why (and how) men can and should enjoy this show.

So the premise is girly. I won’t argue that. A bunch of women who want to be famous go to Hollywood to meet a guy who a bunch of producers painted in a favorable light last season in hopes that he smells as good as he looked on TV and they’ll make pretty babies together in a year or two, in which a camera crew will follow their journey to happily ever after and somehow they will absorb money like a sponge does water through looking pretty and doing nearly no “work” for the rest of their lives. Ladies, I don’t think many of you will tell me that I am too far off.

However, in the same way that anyone can watch their favorite movie and say to themselves, “there is no way that can happen in real life, but I will allow myself to go with it for the sake of entertainment,” so to is how we must approach watching the Bachelor. Real life doesn’t mean your first date involves helicopters, private lagoons, fireworks, and an entire castle to yourself, save the personal performance by Matt Nathanson or Hootie or someone akin to that B- level celebrity who is happy to sing a love song as long as the camera is running. It’s not real life, and that’s fine. It is the only way 25+ women can genuinely believe that they are in love after dating a guy for two weeks and having a total of three conversations with him, two of which were at 3:15 a.m. before a rose ceremony.

Now, before I go on, I should apologize to anyone who watches this show differently than I do. I know that there are people like my wife who do genuinely root for some people on that show because they connect with them. Her two favorite people in the world after our dog are Shawn and Kaitlyn from last season. I don’t judge or care why someone likes a show; if my watching old seasons of Entourage means she wants to image search all the good looking guys in the show, I call that a win-win. The same can be the case for the Bachelor. If she can connect with the women and their stories while I can banter with her about how Chris Harrison clasps and unclasps his hands at least six times every time he addresses a group of people (seriously, if you haven’t noticed, watch his hands when he talks), win-win.

Lately, watching the Bachelor has gotten more interesting with the advent of FANTASY BACHELOR, a game in which you spend fake–nay “fantasy” money to build a roster of women after episode one. Points are scored on drunkenness (more prevalent in the Bachelorette, because the guys tend to get drunker earlier on that show than do the ladies), kissing (bonus points for makeouts or doubles+), roses, fights, and all sorts of other little things that make watching the show that much more fun.

Ultimately, it’s OK if the men of the world watch the Bachelor. The fact that I haven’t even mentioned that there are twenty-five 21-35 year old good looking women (for the most part) should be enough to at least allow you to watch an episode or two, especially now that Monday Night Football is on hiatus.


Author: ryanjrauch

I am not here to change the world. I am here to change my world.

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